The Desire to Express Happiness


0:00 so for me the final piece of all of this
0:04 conversation is about for me personally
0:07 how to come out of the cave in terms of
0:10 relationship because I know for a fact
0:12 that nothing outside of me is gonna make
0:14 me happy not you know a man or a better
0:17 job or a bigger house all of that I I
0:19 know that and yet does that mean I’m
0:22 always ins you know like how do you then
0:25 be in that knowing and still be able to
0:29 relate with a man with the job yes yes
0:32 you’re quite right it the implication of
0:35 this understanding is not that we should
0:37 never have an intimate relationship is
0:39 not that we shouldn’t try to change our
0:41 job if appropriate although we should
0:43 move house or anything like that not at
0:46 all the implication is that we no longer
0:50 look for love and happiness in
0:55 relationships and objects we no longer
1:00 see relationships as a potential source
1:03 of nerve we no longer see objects as a
1:08 potential source of happiness that
1:10 doesn’t mean to say that we can’t relate
1:14 with people or interact with objects in
1:16 others to have relationships intimate or
1:21 otherwise order to change job to for
1:24 instance the desire you may have just an
1:29 example for instance before you ever
1:33 became interested in in these matters
1:35 you might have been just a regular you
1:40 can in fact you will have been just a
1:42 regular ego like all the rest of us
1:44 looking for objects activities
1:47 relationships in order to fulfill the
1:51 sense of longing that lived in your
1:54 heart so for that reason that that that
1:56 sense of longing would have propelled
1:58 you towards certain relationships or
2:00 activities but be employment now you
2:04 start exploring your your true nature
2:06 you begin to really taste the
2:11 qualities that are inherent in your true
2:15 nature and you begin to realize that all
2:19 these objects that you previously went
2:22 towards are no longer a source of love
2:25 and happiness is a kind of turning
2:27 around now when you then and this is
2:30 your own your questions about when you
2:31 go back to the world of objects and
2:33 relationships you no longer you no
2:44 longer see them as a source of happiness
2:49 as a source of love but you see them
2:53 instead as an opportunity to share your
2:58 new understanding so you may for
3:01 instance feel okay I no longer want to
3:03 do this employment the reason I chose
3:06 this employment was because it suited
3:08 the demands and the fears of the self
3:11 that I then believed myself to be now
3:16 those demands and fears are no longer
3:17 operating or at least they are largely
3:20 disappeared so i find that I’m no longer
3:24 drawn to that kind of work if I were to
3:28 choose employment now I would want to do
3:29 something that expressed more fully this
3:33 new understanding so a desire might
3:35 arise in you I want to change jobs that
3:38 desire is not a desire that arises on
3:41 behalf in other words it’s not a desire
3:43 that comes from a separate self seeking
3:47 fulfillment in an activity on the
3:49 country it’s a desire that comes from
3:52 happiness or love or peace seeking to
3:56 share itself in relationship so it would
4:01 be very legitimate to choose your job or
4:04 to have an intimate relationship or to
4:06 move house for that reason as an
4:10 expression exactly so it’s not desires
4:14 are not a problem don’t feel that you
4:17 have to
4:19 abandon your desires no what’s the
4:23 problem is to seek happiness through an
4:27 object but desire continues after that
4:33 particular desire they can still be a
4:36 desire for an object but it is a desire
4:39 not to find happiness but to express
4:42 happiness or peace or love or
4:45 intelligence

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